en route; 
"This isn’t a call to deconstruct every mundane action in your life, every movie you watch, every meal you eat, or every mile you drive, but maybe we do need to think about it a little. Be mindful about what our lives are doing to us."
- Ben Howard, 10 Terrible Life Lessons Super Mario Taught Us
(READ IT. it's hilarious, though it probably needs to be taken with a pinch of salt. relax, people. it's just a joke, though it's honestly quite well thought through.)
it's crazy how so many things can change within the span of two hours,
and as much as it changes a lot of things, i can't really tell if i'm affected. perhaps it's the whole notion that ying mentioned while chatting with her that day: God will guard your heart. so thank God for listening &for making arrangements in my life <3
.
long live Mario Kart. 
to my retarded, silly, crazy, monstrous sister,
happy (belated) birthday!! (:
plus.
in commemoration of my replacement kindle coming to me (hopefully soon), I SHALL GO SHOP FOR KINDLE COVERS bwahahaha . so i spent yesterday &today feeling a bit upset about things i felt i couldn't achieve. i was demoralized, upset &discouraged, and honestly, i felt useless, especially in environments where you lack control.
but after two days of being upset, two cups of coffee &an awesome lemon meringue, you realize that there's more to be grateful for than anything. in the midst of my sadness, without me needing to say much, my dad came up to me &asked me if there was any way he could help me with my work, followed by singing 'Oppa Gangam Style' to me in the car while driving to dinner. boonyi somewhat persuaded me to talk to him, sab &dz, of which all of them took time off to try to cheer me up &sent me awesome words of encouragement, despite being so far away. i also managed to get in some coffee time with esther, boonyi &kai after a short but hectic week.
"Life is filled with love, love that stretches and nearly bursts every seam it presses against, love that spoils us and surrounds us so completely as to let us forget it is there. It’s almost embarrassing to take a moment and consider all of the love that you are privy to, that you are an active participant in, that you get to take home with you at the end of the day — but we have to. Let’s never allow ourselves to believe in the ludicrous idea that there’s only one kind of love, and that you either have it or you don’t. Perhaps such a myth sells us movie tickets, but it will never make us happy."
- Chelsea Fagen, There Is More Than One Kind Of Love
happy weekend, everyone (:
xoxo. there comes a point in your life where you feel like nothing you do is right.
i don't think the point is entirely here yet,
but frankly speaking, i can feel it coming nearer and nearer each day. 
w-e-e-k-e-n-d!
spent saturday at home with mom, my laptop &tv (: and it felt awesome, because for the first time in quite awhile, there was nowhere to go, nothing urgent to do, and so on.
spent sunday at church, then dragged alvin &kai around town buying stuff &eating A LOT. like seriously a lot. when it came to dinner time (CLAYPOT CHICKEN RICE ftw!) with the family &some family friends, i was already half dead &dying, but somehow i managed to find space for some b&j's with bubs &kai. according to kai, i seem to have 3 stomachs when it comes to dessert HAHAHA.
spent my lovely public holiday monday thinking that today was saturday, before proceeding to go shopping with the amazing bubbleeees! it was a day of spending (though much more on her part) &just talking random crap throughout the whole day. we also spent at least 10 minutes staring at the 'fountain' at MBS &realizing that it really, really resembled a toilet bowl flush (#imageruined), before meeting boonyi &esther for dinner at aston's! (: whootwhoot.
happy four day week, everyone!
it would be awesome if every week should be a four day week. hahaha. ".. A person deserting you triggers a flurry of emotions. Frustration with them for parting ways. Disappointment in yourself for not being more open, or interesting enough to stick with. Empathy toward them because you know that you’re quite the handful. It’s a very disappointing, confidence-killing mixture of feelings and sensations that take a strong mind to recover from.
Anyone who feels the need to protect his or herself feels so for a reason. Ultimately the motivation for defense is not wanting to be judged. Whether it’s your past, your present conflicts, family business, or some other situation, the general fear is that our secrets will condemn us. That this is lose-lose. That even if we tell you, it’ll go terribly. That no matter what, the end result will be regret. Because someone will either get sick of our shutdown ways, or come to find that they hate the person we truly are, and the experiences we’ve had/are currently having."
- Christopher Hudspeth, It Sucks Being Guarded &Difficult to Love
it's been a good(?) week.
meet ups with good friends &heart to heart talks over drinks or coffee really help to make things better, and taking time each night to read really makes me happier. (and the question mark stays there because it honestly hasn't been a very good week, but it hasn't been a very bad week either.)
perhaps all i need is sleep.
happy hari raya puasa to all my muslim friends &colleagues! (:
enjoy the long weekend!
“I felt like I had proof that not all days are the same length, not all time has the same weight. Proof that there are worlds and worlds and worlds on top of worlds, if you want them to be there.”
― Carol Rifka Brunt, Tell The Wolves I'm Home
national day dinner with ching, michael &kai,
followed by a late night supper with my jc boys, angmoh (FINALLY!!) &gene (: the silly angmoh disappeared to europe a few years back, &i haven't seen him since then. besides the whole growing up, maturing factor &the silly hair, nothing has changed &it really felt like old times once again (:
on a happier note,
despite the death of my kindle &the delays in getting it replaced, i've got my kindle reader for mac, so i finally finished up my uncompleted book, along with a quick tanning session thanks to my retarded bodyclock which woke me up so freaking early in the morning :/
next up: weekend! TGIF everyone!
it's been a relatively good week (: “Yesterday was a closed book, tomorrow, however, was another story.”
― Cecelia Ahern, The Book of Tomorrow
so i've made silly mistakes in my life.
now it's time to pick up the pieces, and see where everything goes from here.
things. will. be. okay.
(especially when there's baking involved!)
happy national day, everyone! (: 
happy birthday dingdingdingsss (:
cheers to more bandung, suppers, hendricks &more late night mcdonalds!
xoxo; 
sunday coffee! with kai, our very own budding, training policeman ;)
we also had ice cream, which melted within seconds thanks to the craaaazy sun, as well as tea with alvin at vivo. well, i had tea. alvin obviously had steak, and kai obviously had his chips &salsa. hahaha.
PLUS: a lollipop! from selamat, my awesome colleague, who left this at my desk when he found out i didn't really have a good day on monday! i realized i have awesome colleagues who are always ready to feed me. lollipops from selamat, huggy bears &hello pandas from candy, and AN ENORMOUS PACK OF KINDER BUENO from rachel! i am definitely blessed with these awesome people <3
national day eve tmr! thank God for long weekends (:
to stop thinking or to keep thinking?
when your kindle dies &you're too lazy to call amazon, you realize you spend most of your time on ThoughtCatalogue that you're actually running out of things to read. but most of all, nothing beats spending time with your best friend on a chilly saturday afternoon (:
"And that’s why I want to tell you I’m here for you — because I am. Not in the therapist sense, not in the let’s-talk-about-our-crap-boyfriends-over-martinis sense, but the real sense: I love you enough to make room for your pain in my heart and handle it like my own. Or better than my own, because my own usually ends up stuffed into a back corner of my brain and left there to ferment into a viscous, sour liquor.
..
I may not give the best advice, or even moderately good advice, but I’m here for you. I may not give you any advice at all — sometimes there just isn’t any, just try what sucks the least and hope for the best — but I’m listening. You can talk to me about anything you want; your fears and apprehensions, the things you’re afraid to acknowledge let alone say out loud. They probably won’t go away but maybe they’ll get smaller and a little easier to deal with, and that’s still something.
..
Genuine friendship is a rare thing and that’s why I want to tell you I’m here for you. And when I say I’m here for you, it’s because I need you too — your existence makes me lighter; your presence helps tease out the mess of the world."
- Mila Jaroniec, I'm Here For You 
